5 Years and learning to surrender

Zack and I will celebrate our 5 year wedding anniversary on Sunday. I've been thinking on it for awhile. Its amazing to me all that has happened in those 5 years and how quickly the time has gone by. When I got married I had a vision or what I thought was a vision for Zack and I's life. Our life certainly does not look like what I pictured. I'm glad it doesn't. If everything we planned or pictured happened exactly that way how boring life would be and how little we would learn.

Much of what I have learned can't be described, but one thing God has been constantly teaching me is what trusting Him means. Trusting God is in very few ways easy for me (as I'm sure is the case with most everyone). Some use the phrase 'trust God' as a single statement that covers everything. But lately I've been realizing that trusting God is very similar to surrendering to Him; in fact, I think if you surrender everything/every part of you to Him then you trust Him. I've surrendered myself to Him many times in many ways and have to continue to do so daily. After my sister died I had to learn to surrender the rest of my family to Him and trust that He knows best. After we had Peter I had to learn to surrender Peter and entrust Peter to God. It has just been fairly recently that I've learned how to surrender and surrender completely my marriage to Him and surrender my 'plans' for my family to God. I have to trust that God has a plan not only for my life but for Zack and I as a couple and for us as a family. And I have to trust that that plan is a good one; meaning it will bring Him glory even when I can't imagine my life at the moment being glorious to anyone let alone the Creator of the universe.

Only when I trust that God is working in my life, that He has a plan and is fulfilling that plan can I be content where I am at. I have to surrender my ideas and everything else to the One who knows all and who loves me and my family more than I can imagine.

My prayer is that as I continue to live my life that I would remember how beautiful my Lord really is and how today I stand in awe of Him for all that He is and all that He has done.

Job searching...

Not fun. Job searching is not fun at all. Repeat this twice.

Something else that's not fun: last night Peter said, "My throat hurts, its gonna pop out, its gonna pop out." I finally translated that into....I'm going to throw-up. I was holding him on my lap reading a book and got up and carried him to the bathroom book and all. We made it to the bathroom in time although I still had a huge mess to cleanup....suffice it to say whole toilet and surrounding area is now sparkling clean.

Ex-Employee

So the story begins 3 or so months ago when I learned that the project my team at Un-named Company was working on was ending/changing sooner then planned...and that it was over budget. My whole Data Quality (DQ) team (me included) were covered under this budget. So there was a few tense weeks as they decided what to do with the DQ team. They finally decided to keep us around as long as originally planned (Jun 1st). Now for a little background I was hired as a DQ temp before the project but I was moved to the project when DQ was eliminated from the business side of things...not that any of that really matters anymore.

Last Thursday I got a phone call from my supervisor and when I got to her office our HR person was also there...but I was a little slow and it took a min or so for me to get that I was losing my job. And after that, I had to go round up my team so they could be told too. Needless to say it was a shock to me. Data Quality or at least some of my job functions are necessary for the business so I never really thought they would get rid of DQ complete (read get rid of me). My team's last day was thursday. I went back on Friday to try and leave DQ in as good a place as I could so the next person could pick it up whenever they bring Data Quality back and whoever fills in in the mean time.

Some things I've learned through working for Un-named Company and leaving Un-named Company:
I love Data Quality
I'm a data geek
I'm capable of more than I thought I was
I can manage a team of people
I can have a professional relationship with people that are completely different from me
Working moms are still moms

Some things that I've re-learned while working at unsaid company
God is in control
Being joyful is a choice
Trusting God is a daily and sometimes hourly choice
Putting people in boxes is usually only helpful for the first 5 mins that you meet them

Purpose Driven Life

Zack and I are in a small group at church and we are reading the book "Purpose Driven Life" by Rick Warren. I'll admit that I thought my life was headed in the right direction but it turns out I still have A LOT to learn in the department. Warren asks some really good questions, but he does it in a way that I haven't gotten use to yet...meaning that its not written in the way I thought it would be. It doesn't appeal to my emotions; in fact it doesn't really appeal at all it just lays down the facts as given by God in the bible. We started reading the book 2 weeks ago tomorrow perfect timing I'd say as you'll see in my next post.

More posts to come on Purpose Driven